A year ago, I was flat broke. I had just injured my bad knee during WFTDA Regionals, I was emotionally spent from a year of being disrespected, and I had spent all my money trying to force an extracurricular activity into a sport.

This year, my body feels great (even if it’s overweight), I can hold a conversation without yelling or being yelled at (mostly), and I just booked a real family vacation. And by real, I mean we are taking The Kitten to see and play in real snow for the first time, not just squeezing in a day’s visit to an amusement park because Mommy’s too busy acting like a bad-ass.

It’s funny how everything works out for the best (even though I’m still a bad-ass).

Yesterday, after receiving a ticket for not wearing a seatbelt and then tailgating another officer while still not wearing a seatbelt, I joked about setting a record for non-moving violations. Today, I received another ticket for not wearing a seatbelt…from the same officer who gave me a ticket yesterday. I just laughed.

Yesterday, the officer asked for my license without any hint of friendliness. Today, I smiled widely and and asked him “How are you doing today?” He just shook his head. I told him “I never wear it” (I don’t believe it should be against the law, and I certainly don’t believe that people should be pulled over only for not wearing seatbelts). He wrote that it in the comments on the ticket. Huh?

Today, he tried to walk off without being friendly again. I said, “See you tomorrow!” Then he actually smiled. Surprise, surprise…he gave me a tip. Tomorrow, he will be at the Valero on Memorial writing tickets for blocking the intersection instead of chasing people down Memorial for not wearing a seatbelt. I told him “Well, I never do that!”

(Oh, and I lied about never wearing a seatbelt. My daughter usually makes me when she’s in the car. For the record, that’s three seatbelt tickets this year…I wonder if I can start a fund during open enrollment to help pay for these?…a small price to pay for libertarianism.)

I’ve been quiet about this foolishness too long. I have to get it off my congested chest. The way flat-track roller derby has climbed onto the coattails of a movie about banked-track roller derby is driving me crazy.

Flat-track skaters sit around bitching and moaning about how flat-track derby is not your momma’s roller derby and it’s a legitimate “sport” with rules and what-not and blah blah blah. Then we all turn around and kiss Drew Barrymore’s ass because she learned how to roller skate and made a movie about it. How about this little gem from one of the “trainers” who explains she couldn’t even do a 360 when teaching the movie stars? That’s the crap you’re telling Hollywood it’s ok to spoon-feed us, when you’ve got derby girls in your own backyard who can do so much more.

I just don’t get it. Flat-track puts all these rules in place, practices as much as professional athletes do to set up a grassroots sport, distances itself from the history of banked-track, and lets Hollywood come along with a gimic to put it right back where it started, with a new generation of fans believing roller derby is still the same ol’ stuff.

OK, fine…that actually suits my style better. I have nothing against banked-track; in fact, that’s what I grew up dreaming of doing. Still would if I had the chance, but life goes on for the common (wo)man and sometimes dreams just aren’t a part of it. But I spent three years of my life trying to do something more rewarding, and it’s hard to reconcile the two for me. I’m sure it’s a great movie, but it’s not about what I lived or what thousands of other flat-track skaters are still living. I just wish it was about “modern” roller derby. I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who feels this way.

So bring on the hate mail. I can take it. I’m a real derby girl.